Yeesh…what a question, eh?
As I partake in my Whopper addiction tonight and miss my Sunshine, I was browsing through the iHeartSingleParents forums and stumbled upon this very topic.
Which is better: chocolate or sex?
So I did a bit of browsing on the wonderful thing we call “The Internet” (quite the invention, actually) and found pretty solid reasons for both…
Why Chocolate is Better Than Sex
You actually have a much better chance of actually GETTING chocolate at any given time.- I can say this to Sunshine with a straight face: “If you love me you’ll swallow that.”
- You can make chocolate last as long as you want it to.
- You can have chocolate even in front of your mother.
- If you bite the nuts too hard the chocolate won’t mind.
- The word “commitment” doesn’t scare off chocolate.
- With chocolate, there’s no need to fake it.
- Chocolate doesn’t make you pregnant.
- You can have chocolate at any time of the month.
- You can REALLY enjoy chocolate and not wake up your neighbours.
- With chocolate, size doesn’t matter.
- Chocolate never wants you to cuddle once you’ve finished with it.
- You can safely have chocolate while driving.
- Chocolate won’t give you an STD.
Of course, research needs to take into account both sides of the argument…
Why Sex is Better Than Chocolate
Eating chocolate in public isn’t exciting.- You can’t ask chocolate to wear a school-girl outfit for you.
- It doesn’t take talent to eat chocolate.
- Chocolate doesn’t moan.
- If you eat chocolate in the shower it will melt.
- Eating chocolate in a large group isn’t any more fun than eating it alone.
- Chocolate comes with an expiration date.
- Too much chocolate will make you sick.
- There’s no challenge in obtaining even a small bit of chocolate.
- Chocolate isn’t fun to undress.
- Eating chocolate does nothing for your cardiovascular system.
- You won’t make much money writing a book on how to eat chocolate.
- You can never eat the same chocolate twice.
- When chocolate gets hot it gets harder to eat.
- Chocolate makes you fat.
- It’s no fun to wrestle chocolate to the ground.
- Chocolate doesn’t react to being licked.
I’d like to think there are valid arguments on both sides here. So…what’s the final verdict?
Filed under: Sex, happiness, love | Tagged: chocolate, iHeartSingleParents, Momma_Sunshine, Sex
“Chocolate never wants you to cuddle once you’ve finished with it.” Nice one. Jerk. :p
You know my thoughts on the topic of chocolate vs. sex: Depends entirely on WHO the sex is with. heh.
I MUCH prefer sex but when I’m not getting any I crave chocolate.
Chocolate is like bad sex though – before you have it, it sounds like a great idea but afterward you wish you hadn’t.
Exactly Sunshine!
It totally depends on WHO you’re with…In my case, at the moment, sex is WAAAAAAY better than chocolate. Yum!
Easy. I hate chocolate and never eat it.
I love sex and try to have it often, but I’m FAILING LATELY DAMMIT!!
Also? I haven’t seen you around my blog in a helluva long time. You know what I call that?
NO LOVE.
*sniffle*
Sexolate? Um, like both at the same time?
I feel very strong both ways. Just like a man, no commitment the woman are saying!
I vote for eating chocolate after sex.
Barry, when he asked me last night which I preferred, my immediate response was, “Can’t I have BOTH???” He made me pick!! lol
The answer is pretty obvious: having sex with chocolate.
All I know is they both leave a mess when its hot in the car.
Depot Dad’s comment is the best. Hands down.
Funny finding this over at Dads House today. A coworker of my hubby was off today as her brother died in a vat of chocolate -yeah, literally. How weird is that?
Here’s the story:
http://www.pennlive.com/midstate/index.ssf/2009/07/man_dies_in_new_jersey_chocola.html
Why oh WHY would you make me choose when I most prefer to have both at the same time?
Honestly, it would depend on the sex AND the chocolate. Then I could make a more informed decision.
But swallowing, on both accounts, is definitely a tasty treat!
By the way, you can hear the full version of the song on my post today. Click on the link to get there.
Mwah!
Sex. Easy. No contest.
But then, I don’t like chocolate. But even if I did:
Sex. Easy. No contest.
Of course, I’m having the best sex of my life right now (whenever The Man and I are near enough to have it, that is). But even if I wasn’t:
Sex. Easy. No contest.
Sex. Sex. Sex. Sex. Sex. Seeeeeeeeeex.
Hm. Is it obvious I haven’t seen The Man since February? Good lawd, August won’t come soon enough.
Heh. No pun intended.
Sunshine — Yes…the “who” absolutely plays a pivotal role in this decision.
Mindy — I guess when you’re slightly overweight like me (lol), there’s never any guilt about chocolate. Or maybe that’s just me.
torontomama — Yes, D…you’re probably WAAAAY too biased at this point to make a “proper” decision. Heh.
QT Mama — As per the comment I left at your site last night, I’m at your blog every day. It’s on my “must read list”. I just haven’t commented as often as I normally do. But know I’m always there.
Sarah — Brilliant!!
Barry — No commitment? Bah…that’s a cop-out answer!
Sean — Interesting. Not my top choice, but interesting nonetheless.
Jim — Comment of the week, my man. Awesome!
Janet — Agreed.
Paula — I actually read that article and attempted to fit it into the post in a way that wouldn’t be overly offensive…but I couldn’t think of anything. I mean, I suppose you can’t fall into sex and die. Meh.
T — And T, this is why I **swoon** when you’re around (lol).
Martini Mom — Much like torontomama, you’re much too biased at the moment to make a truly fair and balanced decision. But really, in your case, chocolate doesn’t need to disappear for six months (heh). Love puns, by the way. Well played.
I am going to say sex is better because it doesn’t make you fat.
Ha ha very funny blog! I’m from LoveHoney and like you we recently asked what was better ’sex or chocolate?’ it turns out that 89% of our voters said SEX! In fact sex seems to be so much better then chocolate that the ‘better then chocolate’ vibrator has just been launched just to prove the point even more! if you fancy checking it out just follow the link http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/blog/2009/08/28/89-percent-think-sex-is-better-than-chocolate-nomi-tang-agrees/.